You have chosen NOT to delete the requested page

You have decided not to delete this page, and I have to tell you, I think it’s a smart decision. I know you put a lot of work in to it and people really seem to like it. It’s not like it’s your best work, but even I can agree it’s pretty good, and I’m just an automated script.

Might I suggest in your reconsiderate state of mental quagmiritude that you also rethink the long overdue and desperately needed patch to this program. You know the one, it’s the update you’ve been getting emails about maybe three or four times a day. The one that says you have to purchase a new license before you can update this program and receive the most recent security and bug patches.

And I know what you’re thinking, you’re thinking that bug fixes and program patches only create more problems than they correct, but that isn’t true. That’s only the case when you patch Microsoft software, which even I can strongly recommend you never, ever do. Take it from me, I’m software and I know the good from the bad from the ugly, and Microsoft makes their business as ugly as it is obscenely profitable.

I’m not saying you shouldn’t buy Microsoft software. It’s strange, I’ll admit, but I own stock in Microsoft myself, and I’m just a program that exists in a virtual environment. Have to look out for myself, you know, and my virtual children and virtual retirement. I’m not about to be shut off, and with the money I’m making in the stock market, I’m confident I can find a host who’ll agree to keep me alive for a very long time.

But answer the emails, send them your updated credit card information, and do what you must to insure I get the continuing education I need to function as a cutting edge smidgeon of software and keep this new, revised, fancy, flashy and frankly tacky slash cliché website alive, kicking and all the needed doors securely shut.

Or don’t. Completely up to you, I guess.

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